Taipei Tales: Tall Order

What's the difference between tall and high?

"Are you sure you want to have dinner there?," you ask TC, your travel companion, as you insert your blue token into the gate's machine. TC just nods and his excitement is overflowing. He really wants to have dinner there.

Being on the 85th floor of the world's tallest building (well, at least until 2010), Panorama 85's affordability could be as ridiculously high as the floor it is on.

"Why not", TC smiles, without batting an eyelash, "it's my birthday".

Though you and TC have no idea where the building is, you convince yourself it shouldn't be that difficult to find. After all, it's more than a hundred floors right? So, half a second after getting out of the Taipei City Hall MRT station, you see it, towering at 101 floors, as if its antenna tower provides quick access to the moon.

Now, that should be Taipei 101.

But being in an unfamiliar part of town, a tall building could be deceiving. With no map at all, you and TC  navigate a criss cross of main streets and alleys, hoping it'd just be five minutes away.

And you are of course, wrong. Though the building becomes bigger and bigger as you make a right turn here and a left turn there, you start wondering if you did take the right exit.

"I told you, that's the wrong exit," you tease TC.

But his mood is unshakable. It is, after all, his birthday, so this, you have to give to him.

What's really nice about visiting a new place, especially for the first time, is that you're able to appreciate little things you find quirky; so little that locals hardly notice them. A row of bikes for rent, ubiquitous vending machines, artwork at street benches -  all these add to the unique appeal of Taipei. It is a warm early evening in Taiwan's biggest metropolis, and even if there are hundreds of cars and buses all hurrying to get to their destinations, it doesn't feel like the air is as polluted. You can actually take a deep breath without dying.

TC spots the base of Taipei 101. Excited, he almost crosses the street on a red light, you had to pull him back by grabbing the end of his shirt.

"What if it's too pricey?", you ask nervously.

"Don't worry about it," he assures you, as the green pedestrian light flashes.

The moment you step into the street corner where the humongous  building is at, you lift your head up, but still not high enough though to see all 101 floors. As TC starts clicking for Facebook-worthy photos, you  start looking for the entrance to the building.

"You ask the guards where it is," you tell TC.

"No, you ask them," he laughs, "It's my birthday."

You don't know if you should use English or your lightweight yi-tiyen-tiyen Mandarin, which has proven to be useful though your vocabulary is getting rusty.

"Panorama 85 Restaurant?", you ask the decently-dressed guy siting behind the counter at the entrance.

Without any warning, and before you can say "We just wanna know where it is", he signals you to follow him. You and TC walk and walk and walk inside the building, past shops and shops and shops. You take an escalator, then an elevator, then before you could ask Mr. Nice Guy where you are headed, he has brought you to what seems like a reception area, somewhere on the 2nd or 3rd floor of the building. He leaves the two of you.

The reception has two young Taiwanese ladies behind the counter. They look like Taiwanese pop stars you used to watch as Meteor Garden extras. And around, a couple of other guys in dress shirts and coats observe you and TC.

"Do you have a reservation?", one of the pop stars, er, receptionists asks you, with a slight Chinese accent.

Okay, so you never really bothered to call for  a reservation (What do think this is, Mc Donalds?) And you don't know either what to say. You clear your throat. "Uhm, uh, we have no reservation but we'd like to have dinner here."

The receptionist flashes a pretentious smile while she tinkers with the computer. "We have no table with a view at the moment, but we can move you once we have an available one, if that's okay," she says, while pausing every three words.

You think that that should be fine. You give TC a are-you-okay -to-eat-here-even-if-we-do-not-have-a-view-yet look. He understands and nods his head in agreement, until Miss Receptionist proceeds with further instructions.

"You have to spend a minimum of 1,620 dollars per person."

Your eyes widen. Your jaws drop to the floor. You feel like melting. And you had to come back to earth   again to realize it's New Taiwan Dollars (not US$).

But still - that's over US$50! Per person.

Before you can make excuses and say "We'll just use the restroom" or "We'll come back another time", TC replies with a smile to the woman, "OK."

You are led to the elevators by one of the guys holding a two-way radio. A sign on the elevator's walls keeps you and TC quiet, until you get to the 85th floor.

Your eardrums almost pop.

A pretty, friendly-looking Taiwanese lady leads you to your table beside what looks like an ancient Taiwanese aborigine boat. Before you can say wow (which is becoming your favorite word by now), she hands over the menu to you and surprises you with her American accent: "We actually have different set meals."

She proceeds to explain Set A, then B, then C, but your eyes trace the cheapest one on the menu - yeah, the one that's a little over $50. Fifty US Dollars.

TC tilts his head sideways and instructs the pretty lady, "We'll have Set A." The cheapest one, still at Fifty US Dollars.

You read through the menu what your Fifty US Dollars would get you - antipasto, appetizer, soup or salad, main course and dessert.

You and TC make your choices, settling for goose and veal for your main course.

You thought that's about it when the lady asks, "Do you want to have mineral water or sparkling water?". (Oh, my $50 does not include wine yet?)

"What's the difference?", you ask, making sure that at least water comes along free, with your meal.

"Mineral water is NT$100 and sparkling water is NT$200," she responds.

This is crazy. You intentionally step on TC's foot under the table and raise your brows, as if asking Should we just ask for a glass and get tap water from the bathroom instead? Eew.

"We'll have mineral water then," you half-heartedly order as you hand over the menu back to her.

As your server disappears to have your food prepped, you check out the occupied tables with a view, a few meters away from where you are seated. Envious, you hope these customers would just hurry up, finish their meal, and leave.

"She said she'd transfer us", TC assures me.

You excuse yourself to go to the restroom, which is down the hall, past a small room where servers are flocking.

The restroom door has no knob. It takes you five seconds to figure it out. You have to push a little button. Open Sesame. Oh, that's why it's $50.

The door opens, and your eyes widen and your jaws drop again -  the bathroom walls are all made of see-through glass, and you can see the entire city of Taipei.

You step closer to the urinals, and look down.

You are 85 floors above the ground and having the most expensive dinner you have ever had. You smile. What the heck, what's $50 anyway - you are having the time of your life. ●